Independence Day: Resurgence

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A couple of interesting things happened on the same day. I found out writer/director Roland Emmerich said he thought superhero movies were silly. He went on about people fighting crime and running around in capes. Now, a statement like that wouldn’t bother me from a Scorsese or a Coen brother; but Emmerich is the guy that made White House Down, 10,000 B.C., Anonymous, Godzilla, and one of the worst movies I had seen in 1996 — despite it being the highest grossing movie that year — Independence Day. It was such a hokey mess, but hey…folks like action pictures and alien attacks.

It’s 20 years later and Emmerich is going to make a big splash at the box office going back to that well.

Sure, Will Smith won’t be on board to fight the aliens. My favorite guy from that first cast, Robert Loggia, isn’t alive. Randy Quaid is hiding out in Canada dodging authorities, not aliens. And an interesting character actor I always liked, Robert Pine (CHiPs)…in the last 20 years, his son Chris became a much bigger star than him.

The other interesting thing I found out is that Independence Day: Resurgence, wasn’t going to be screened for the critics. That’s always a bad sign. They figure they’re going to make their money from the fans that aren’t tired of these retreads, so why deal with the bad press?

I was complaining about this with another critic and realized something. A cliche movie critics use when a movie is bad: “That’s two hours I will never get back.” Yet here I am, being blessed with two hours I didn’t lose! I’ll just need something to say when I’m doing my movie reviews on the air.

Then something occurred to me. Radio host Chip Franklin on KGO in San Francisco, used to do a bit that I was involved in once or twice. It was us reviewing movies before they came out, by merely watching the trailers. Surprisingly, we could usually nail it. Sometimes comedies could be tough, because as we all know — they show the funniest parts in the commercials.

So, after receiving a couple of emails from the studio that showed me when the new posters came out, or the latest trailers, or story ideas on how people can look up their street to see how it’s destroyed in the movie…I thought I’d watch the trailer and review that. Here it is.

Jeff Goldblum is an actor I always enjoy on screen, but hearing him say “Oh my God” made me wonder if he was looking at the latest dinosaur in Jurassic Park (sometimes actors bring a bit of baggage to these roles).

When I heard the line “They’re coming back,” I couldn’t help wonder about Quaid, and if he’ll ever make it back to the States. Surely a National Lampoon’s Vacation Reboot 3 will net him enough money to do his few months in jail.

There were clips of Bill Paxton…or is it Bill Pullman, I always get them mixed up…he’s the President. He’s giving the speech from the first movie. I’m guessing they’re watching a clip of that, or who knows…maybe he’s making the same speech. They’re not only running out of ideas, they’re running out of dialogue for scripts.

I’ve loved Judd Hirsch since his days on Taxi in the late ‘70s, but he was 61-years-old in the first movie. It’s 20 years later. Not sure what he’ll be doing in his 80s.

I noticed there was a scene that showed about 500 alien ships in a dogfight with Earth. So, expect another movie that’s going to load the screen with so many CGI images, you won’t be able to follow the action. They’ll probably have so many deaths that, you won’t feel bad that half the population of Earth has been killed. As long as the main characters shoot down the mother ship, with cigars dangling from their lips, audiences will lap it up.

The trailers didn’t show enough for me to base a solid review on. I did a quick search of the cast, and saw Brent Spiner (Star Trek: The Next Generation) will be back again in this. Interesting character actor William Fichtner is here, and for the ladies — Liam Hemsworth.

The film looks horrifically bad, but if you liked the first movie (which got around 65% on Rotten Tomatoes), and you were excited by the prospect of another…you’re probably not going to be disappointed. I’m certainly not going to be disappointed. I’m going to spend my two hours doing something else; perhaps smoking a cigar like Will did in the first one.

This gets 0 stars out of 5.

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