How to Live Forever

At the Movies Blog
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how to live forever
Perhaps smoking two packs a day and having a beer at the local pub helps.

The last Pirates of the Caribbean had the fellas looking for the Fountain of Youth.

In the new documentary How Do I Live Forever, filmmaker Mark Wexler does the same thing. He visits countries that have a longer life span, and in what will be everyones favorite thing about the movie – he interviews the oldest living people on the planet.

Some are happy to talk with him; others like Buster – with his long beard and crazy eyes – sits there downing pints and smoking cigarettes – talking about the latest marathon he’s going to run. And he tends to get snippy, especially when asked to repeat a line.

A few famous people throw in their two-cents. We hear from Phyllis Diller (who was much more fun in the documentary The Aristocrats), Ray Bradbury (the literary staple at Comic Con each year), Willard Scott, Suzanne Somers (who can fight of Jack Tripper and cancer), and fitness guru Jack LaLanne – who died earlier this year at 96.

Some of the regular man-on-the-street interviews are amusing, but most aren’t. It’s odd that so many, when asked if they would want to live to be 500-years-old, said no. It seems if you say no, you really haven’t thought out the question properly.

And who won’t be amused to see a 94-year-old driving? Or an older woman who marries a younger guy and jokingly says one of the perks is that “we can drive at night.”

And who knew there was a funeral directors convention in Las Vegas? You like the free soaps at hotels, at these you get free samples of embalming fluids (I’m guessing who ever dies in Vegas, doesn’t have to stay in Vegas).

This is certainly a lot more fun a documentary to see than Forks Over Knives, which also has a lot of things that will help you live longer. In fact, now that I think about it, this movie actually doesn’t give you much advice on how to live forever.

Sometimes you got the feeling he was doing all this globetrotting because he could write it all off.

Food critic Jonathan Gold – who seems to be the anti-Forks Over Knives spokesman — would rather eat huge burgers and enjoy life, even if that means dying at 60.

For those that really want to live forever – they can take the route local baseball legend Ted Williams took. You can have your body cryogenically frozen for the low, low price of $150,000. If you want to save some money, it’s $80,000 for just your brain. I’d go that route, so they could hopefully give me a kickin’ body when they’re ready to bring me back with the Splendid Splinter (and we’ll be the ones coming back without splinters from the coffins). Knowing my luck, it’ll be like Steve Martin in The Man With Two Brains, who puts the brain in a great looking body – only to find that brain overeats.

One clever thing that’s done is that every person speaking has their age show on the screen. Sometimes this makes us feel good about how we look, other times the opposite.

The movie tends to meander and Wexler does what Morgan Spurlock (Super Size Me) does that infuriates me – making the documentary more about them than the subject they initially presented.

It gets 2 ½ stars out of 5.

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