White Girl

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I remember watching the NC-17 movie Kids in 1995. It’s what introduced us to actresses Chloe Sevigny and Rosario Dawson. It was controversial for the amount of drug use and sex from underage teens, but was a rather powerful film. This movie feels like it’s trying for that, but just comes across as a gratuitous mess.

Lea (Morgan Saylor of Homeland) is a college student who, upon noticing the thugs and drug dealers outside her apartment, decides it would be best to approach them for pot. I’m not sure why they weren’t wondering why the guys didn’t offer to help the young women carry heavy furniture into their apartment, instead of just laughing at them. I’d think even the dumbest young guys around, would realize that helping a woman out might help them later. Boy, was I wrong. This white girl will sleep with anybody, for any reason; but befriending them…was the first of many bad decisions, which quickly make us stop caring for her.

Her next bad decision comes a few minutes later. It involved doing a few lines of coke off the desk of her boss (Justin Bartha), a magazine editor where she’s an intern. Oh, and after the lines, she has sex with him in his office, right before somebody walks in.

She also starts sleeping with the drug dealer (Brian Marc from Nerve) on the corner of her block in Queens. The first time she invites him up, his homies decide to climb up the fire escape to join them.

And like Sex and the City (this would be the X-rated, teen version), we see Chris Noth. He plays a sleazy lawyer.

Since the couple get involved dealing drugs on a bigger scale, they’re quickly in over their heads. That’s where the lawyer comes in (no pun intended).

I’ve heard writer/director Elizabeth Wood based some of this story on her own experiences. I’m wondering why she didn’t write the protagonist in a way that shows the audience why she’s so self-destructive; or does she think we’ll just enjoy watching the reckless antics of a bunch of losers?

Some of the scenarios are also unrealistic and not the least bit interesting.

It’s strange how movies like the Nymphomaniac films a few years ago, just think they can show us three-ways, nudity, sex in nightclubs, and crazy behavior — and critics claim it’s artistic filmmaking.

A terrific movie, that had a lot of sex but for a reason, was Boogie Nights. That was 20 years ago. Why can’t filmmakers make a film like that, instead of garbage like this?

When it ended, with a scene of a girl in a college class — it was supposed to be powerful. Instead, I thought of the roller girl character in Boogie Nights, sitting bored and out of place, in her classroom.

This movie gets 0 stars. It was virtually unwatchable.

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